nothing's changed. and i cant think it will ever be able to.

these days, its just an aimless path with no end. a close friend, my other half, whatever. i need some one. someone who'd be there, someone i can share myself with. someone, who seems to be impossible to find and, most probably never will exist. at least, her existance would never be within my presence.

i want some one who i can just call out to kill boredom, hang out for even just a few mins, meet at tm, chill at starbucks, have some laughter, and head home. someone who will laugh, talk rubbish, share her life, and the list goes on, with me.

darn. come to think of it. if i ever do meet such a person, i wun even mind if we're only friends and nothing more. sigh. if only i was in TP. SP really screwed up my life. social, emotional, which eventually leads to physical, then psychlogical, and eventually, my life is eaten up.

i just want an exit. i dont wanna play this game of life, alone, ever. at least for now. some times, after leading someone for sometime, you might like to be alone, and just, relieve urself of the burden of having to care, and be in control of others and the situation. its fun and relieving to be alone, single. however, there are times with lonliess gets the better of you, and soon, you'd dread for another companion to join you in your race through this maze called Life, as you find that you'd need an outlet, a need to lead, a need to care for others, and for others to care for you. and now, that is it.

but its hard. so darn hard. oh well, why cry over spilt milk eh?
sigh, might as well, why cry over the western sunrise?

since it's just, impossible?

somethings just dont happen. don't.